My, my, miss American pie, I haven't blogged for a while, you must be about to cryyyy...
I did not blog on Friday because I was sick. I did not blog earlier on today because I was tearing around Valley Fair with Tiffany looking for a promotion dress.
Do you know how much I hate being sick? I hate it a lot. Sickness may be worse than awkwardness. That means the worst emotions in order would be: grief, sickness, awkwardness. I don;t think awkwardness is really an emotion. Neither is sickness, really. What's the right word? Condition? That works for sickness, but not awkwardness. Augh. See what happens when I blog? Had I been talking out loud, I wouldn't have gone into all that, but since I'm writing everything down, I reread and revise and then start tripping over my words, wrestling with my brain to think of the right ones. If that were an emotion, it would certainly make it onto the worst emotions list. Let's talk about sickness, then. I really hate being sick. I think I probably already mentioned that, but I don't want to reread my post lest I start to word-wrangle again. Actually, being sick does not completely suck, if it's a weekend. But I hate missing school. I hate having to make up the homework, the classwork, later having to find out there was something else I'd missed and having to explain I'd been out sick that day, et cetera. Once, in sixth grade, I threw up twice in first period, once in second, and three times in fourth. I didn't tell anybody until lunchtime, and was immidiately shoved into the nurse's office. I was sent home. Bitter defeat. I did not go to any of the cross-country meets this year because they required that I leave school early. I do not like to miss school. So anyway, yeah. When I threw up Friday morning, I thought that would it be it, I could still go to school. But then I threw up again, later, and my mom said that I had to stay home or else I'd get eveybody else sick and the school would sue her for sending a diseased creature to school.
Um. Not exactly. But I did end up staying at home, rolling around in bed and placing my kitty on my stomach so his magical kitty healing powers could stop to churning in my stomach.. I pretended my stomach was an ocean of stomach acid, and all the little pieces of food in there were fish that were about to dissolve and die. That was gross, so I read my mommy's housekeeping magazines. Then I fell asleep for a few hours. I read this weird science-foction book, fell asleep again, and woke up at about one-forty. Blink, blink. Yawn. Stretch. Hmmm. Just like that, I was all better. I considered going to school, but decided to just be lazy and stay home. I'd only get about forty minutes in the end, anyway.
Today, then. What happened today? I had an early softball game. We had to arrive at the field at eight o'clock in the morning. I forgot to eat breakfast. I fouled off two bunts and missed a ground ball. We were smashed, crushed, pulverised like a rotten tomato under a large block of coffee cake. (Yeah, I'm pretty good at analogies, if I do say so myself.)(Metaphors?)(Word-wrangling again, sorry.) Then Tiffany and I met at the Valley Fair mall. We spent over two hours wandering around Macy's and throwing on various concoctions of chiffon, lace, silk, and cotton. I found several that I liked. I found one that I loved. I thought the sixty-dollar article was marked half off, but it wasn't. I didn't even have sixty bucks in my wallet. I had forty. So when the lady waited for me to pay up, I was like, "Um, that one isn't on sale?" She shook her head. "Right. Well, uh, then, um, yeah... never mind..." She clucked her tongue. I shrank away.
We went to Other Places, but Nowhere had The Dress for me. Too bad, so sad.
Just wondering. Do guys have to wear tuxedos at the promotion ceremony? I think I will honestly bust a gut laughing if I view my male peers sporting penguin suits.